Upon My Death

I’ve been thinking lately about my great demise.  I know a lot of folks don’t like to face their own mortality, but I came to terms long ago with the fact that I just won’t live as long as most people do.  It’s really not that big of a deal to me.  I’ll simply enjoy the life I do have.

Anyway, my original plan for my eulogy has my sons freaked out.  I wanted my boys to videotape my doing my own.  Then, after I die, they can prop my body up in my casket and show the video on my face so that it looks like I’m alive and talking. You know, like the audio-animatronic figures in Disney’s Haunted Mansion.  But, the boys seem to think this might cause mass hysteria or mass heart attacks or post traumatic stress or something equally horrible among the funeral attendees. 

So I’m forced to develop a back-up funeral plan.

I’m going to write my own eulogy.  I want my brother to read it, or I’ll have one of the boys do it if Michael isn’t able to for some reason.  I think one of the most difficult things a person can do is to be called upon to write and deliver a loved one’s goodbye.  That’s why I’ll take at least half of it out of my brother’s hands.  I’m sure he won’t think there are enough scriptures quoted or anything like that, but it’s going to be extremely personal – all me. 

So here’s the back-up plan: I’ll be cremated and write my own eulogy that will be delivered at a party to celebrate my life.  I don’t want people to cry.  I want them to remember the good times and laugh.  I want food served, especially cheesecake.  Every funeral party should have at least one cheesecake.  Maybe Nikki will bring one of her lovely Jello brains, complete with worms.

As for my ashes, they can be buried in the family plot in Algood Cemetery, or the boys can pick out a nice spot in a pretty little park somewhere.  They can plant a flowering tree and spring bulbs around a bench.  My ashes can be used to fertilize the plants.  Then I’ll live on, and people can visit me.  They can sit on my bench and enjoy the beauty of the scene.  The beauty I want to leave behind. 

You can shed tears that she is gone

Or you can smile because she has lived

 

You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back

Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left

 

Your heart can be empty because you can't see her

Or you can be full of the love that you shared

 

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday

Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday

 

You can remember her and only that she is gone

Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on

 

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back

Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

 

written 1981

David Harkins 1959 -

Silloth, Cumbria, UK